Confidence is something you teach yourself.

Always take the plunge. Feel the fear you may, but for the sake of your own mind, just take the freaking plunge.

Ya, you might get hurt and obliterated, but hey, stop focusing on the small aspects of the possibilities. Because in reailty, you could just as easily, more easily than you think in fact, achieve success.

And when you are standing at the bottom of that plunge, looking back having completed it to your expectations or surprise, you will suddenly realise that even if you had wiped out, and gotten hurt, this was worth it.

Thus, the next time you are standing at a cliff of impasse, you simply acknowledge that fear, but just look at it and smile and with a triumphant 'w/e' fuckin roll over that shit.

Man it feels good.

By the way, go get the new Tiesto Club Life Vol 2 Miami album, so freaking amazing!!!!!!

If it's broken, fix it.

If things break, we fix them.

Every day, in a good light, we break things. Every day.

We are the breakers.

We are the butcherers of material, and the universe around us.

We twist, bend and shatter things at times to take them apart and understand them more.


Every day, in a good light, we fix things.

We are the healers.

We are forerunners of life. We gain higher understanding through remedy.

Through concious thought in good honor, we all fix things to make them even stronger, and last even longer, and exist even longer.


If we do not repair the breaking of it all, ultimate waste would welcome its way. We forever go on.

It is in this way, that enlightening goodness can prevail.

A Hero Never Rests

Ride with me brother, unto the end and unto the rains of glory.

Don your steel and fire, your gems and sorceries and your faith.

For you will need every edge. The sway of this tide will depend upon it. Depend upon us. Depend upon you.

Ride with me, into the blazing hellheart of our foe.

Amass your light, consume your fears and stand before fate.

This moment , this moment is when you shake god's hand, and smile knowing even he can not dare stand before you.

Smell the dire souls of the wicked, and cast the shade away.

Witness a thousand hearts beat in synchronicity as their inevitable end rests in our hands.

Stand with me brother, ride once more with me, into the tide.

For honor, for glory, for love.

Beautiful Fires.

Some 'Flash Fiction'.

The spark had ignited, and the unquenchable flames were spreading.

In a matter of days, entire towns were starting to burn up. Residents leaving behind only a dime sized spot of ashes. All at once the world erupted.

Chaos and beautiful serenity embraced all faculties. Humanity knew its end was here.

Or beginning.

No scientific or religious explanation was set to answer for what was happening. Not for their lack of effort though, believe me they tried.

The real understanding could only be had after the cinders. People applied a name to the phenomenon; Astral Apex. I guess it was their thought that we reached the pinnacle of this reality and our insides, our minds, or souls, or energy were moving on.

After hundreds of thousands of mankind already burning away, the even more inexplicible started to happen.

We truly never understood fire. It truly, so truly is a god's wonder.

When a previously human inhabited place had been completely vacated, the creations and dwellings of man started to dissipate. Not burn up the same way we were, but just gently dematerialize like a supernova smoldering each individual atom away.

Some ultimate happening was taking place. We were moving on, and all that we had left behind was being cleansed away.

There is no system to where and when this happens. It just does.

I am still here now, waiting.

Not much longer I imagine, though I am ready. Ready to burn up.

I am watching it all pass, and this is not chaos. This is grace. Beautiful awe shaking grace.

I am so hot inside, but it is the most serene warmth I have ever felt in my life. I am burning up like all the rest.

Moments until my eyes close and open to see beyond the universe.

The beautiful fires.

Once.

A smile, bright eyes, and that intention.

It was all there, and so intensely. Intense like the heat of a warming sunray that softly dissapears behind a cloud. There to wash over you, and envelope with caressing warmth, only to without notice go back behind that cloud and dip you back into shade.

There are so many clouds in the sky. So many shapes and sizes...so many that the grey days can go on and on and on.

But clouds do not last forever.

The sun prevails to warm our souls.

And when it grazes past the gloom with confident succession every time, we take the moment to stand in all its glory; cleanse away the cold.

Burn off this shroud and turn the darkness into ashes only to be whisked away by the winds of time. Let go of the grey shawl; drop it to your feet and step away.

Step, stroll, walk, canter, run, leap....leave it behind.

That grey blanket only ever gave you real warmth with the sun pouring over it.
Its patchy affections were only worth the frayed threads you stitched into it.

Begin a new tapestry in the sun. Though, always take that moment to feel the heat. Bathe in the beauty.

It sinks into you.

Love and Hate

There is no one true thing. Sometimes.

Sometimes, life is just so multi-dimensional and complicated as all your imagination can derive.  You can be tethered to one thing so as to forever keep you rooted to that thought, idea and emotion. And all the while, that you are tethered to such a thing, you can brandish opposing thoughts, ideas and emotions and for all that it is worth, believe one or the other, and both at the same time.

You can have the most pure happiness, and be emotionally pitch black in a reflective sense, and then be disturbed and angry that you can even emote that way in relativity to that happiness.  Love, and hate.

I’ve experienced Love and Hate, hating Love, and loving Hate. Though, I hate to love hate, and hate to hate love. All that is desired in the most ultimate sense, is love.

You can have love, possibly just that, but believe that you will hate love, when it is no longer around.
You will in serene honor of that love, hate, that you are hating it, but because you are only human, and a human of yourself, you know that what you want to feel for that love, is love.  This is one in many dimensions of each end.

In an abstract understanding, you can almost say that there is a certain scientific relativity to emotions. It is that we have these emotions and have the possibility to control them as well, though know that there is, and is not outside factors.

The creation of mankind, Time, is a factor in love and hate.

Emotions are the weather network spread over a sheet of time. You can assume, predict, and guesstimate what is, what was, and what will be, yet you know it can all change at any instant.

We are forever on the outside and the inside of our minds. We are forever the same and changing.

Another factor that is, and is not, is perspective.

Perspective can flip, twist and mold alternate realities to emotions, thoughts and ideas. This is the outside and inside of us. Not yourself, but us. Reality may persist to each individual, but it is seen that we are many, and without that many, perspective would be of a solo view and thus bare far less force on our minds.

There are now two outside and inside forces to alter the paths of our emotions. Thoughts already had the capacity to be complicated , contradicting and confusing before we add the forces of time and perspective. Now there’s the possibility for weave within weave within weave within weave…



The beginning starts with love.

It continues forward, with some ebb and flow between certainty and uncertainty. Stability can settle in with either factor, though still change on a whim.

Let’s say we add perspective from two dimensions. This adds two paths of emotional reality, each with the ebb and flow, with possibility for stability for either emotion and each the change on a whim dependant on the multiplied factors of either certainty or uncertainty. ( I am using these two words to provide a generalization of endless possible outside concepts.)

So now, you have two paths, with multiple dimensions.

Throw in a wrench, and push the stop button on Love from either dimension. Now what happens is an explosion of possible dimensions in emotions and ideas.
Either perspective is now beginning to go through the course of Love and Hate weaving. Which now gives two dimensions, multiplied by the effects of time to a severe level due to possible intensities in the emotions for either perspective.

When one perspective takes account for the other this will multiply the dimensions as well to a possible extreme degree.

Then there is the factor of time, each moment in itself already has an extraordinary dimensional possibility to emotional reality. So multiply that by passing time, and you can start to see how endlessly intermixed and messed up things can get.

It’s a flow chart on acid.

But wait. Yes, we are emotional beings. We are as well, logical beings. Sometimes.

Emotion and Logic are absolutely stunningly beautiful things. Without either I would fear for the world that is. In a sense they can be a ying and yang.

You can be freaking out at something, or yourself, and take logic into account ( in the sense of a greater good over the concept of time passing into the future tense) and then freak out that you are freaking out because you god damned know better, logically that freaking out at all is not helping you…AT ALL.

But does that stop us? Sometimes.

Like I said, it is multi-dimensional and down right frustrating at times.


I want to refer back to the factor of time, because with this concept of things being non-constant and un-linear in the idea that due to the simple fact that because of time , now is not then, and then is not now.

Realize that this change, can be a key to proverbial chains that bind us.

When the emotional shitstorm is drenching your mind. Stop, and think of time. Set yourself free and leave that moment to a different one.

If there is reality, then in reality you may have to experience the interconnected weave of love and hate, but you do not have to sit on one point.

This all ties heavily into the thinker and the prover as well. Take the time to introvert yourself when you are thinking on two sides of a coin. Pay attention to how you can rationalize to fields and actually make yourself flow in either direction with little resistance.

Think and Prove

                                                                     
I've begun, once again, to step my way through Robert Anton Wilson's novel, Prometheus Rising. I gave the book a read through once before, though without following the exercises in a more committed manner, I feel that doing so only allowed me to absorb so much from it.
                                                                                       
 It is certainly a read I would recommend to anyone and everyone. It is a mind altering experience. 

And so, my initial exercise begins. "What the thinker thinks, the prover proves." I am to visualize a quarter, and while keeping the thought present, see how many quarters I 'find' on my ventures around. 

Once running this a number of times, I will rationalize it to the fact that, sure there are many quarters just laying around..... and then see how many quarters I find.

After that, believe that by visualizing the quarter, I am attracting it to myself and am in a sort of way giving it existence to be found by me.

Let the quarter count begin.